ComputerHunter.org

 

Do You Make These Common Mistakes When Talking to People?


Many moons ago. Talking to people was something I avoided where possible.

At the time, I did not know I was unconsciously setting myself up for failure. I kept making the same mistakes without even noticing what I was doing wrong.

You may be doing the same thing.

Here are three common mistakes together with tips on how to deal with them:

1. Judging Your Performance Against Unrealistic Standards

Be honest with yourself.

Accept that where you are now in terms of your communication skills is only your starting point - not your finishing point.

And assess your performance and your progress against your typical level of effectiveness. Not against some desired state of perfection or ultimate goal.

Goals are very important as a destination to aim for but do not use long term goals as a standard to judge your current performance against - that is a recipe for disillusionment and massive frustration.

I know. Because I tried it!

2. The Failure To Learn Each Day

As people we can be lazy. This means that a lack of follow through on our goals can go unnoticed. After all we can always catch up some other day.

This attitude will kill your dreams faster than you can spell failure.

When I started to make massive improvements in how I related to people I dedicated myself to becoming excellent.

Once I had proven strategies the rest was easy. I just applied the material each day. I improved each day because I made it a priority and because I committed to applying the material.

Now...

I also know people who learned the same peak performance strategies I learned. Today they are no farther ahead than they were years ago.

How did they pull that off?

By putting it off until another day and by neglecting to use what they had learned. Implementation is crucial.

If you do this your progress is a certainty.

3. Attempting To Be Original

Many years ago I put myself under huge pressure by expecting myself to be original with each person I met.

This is a sure-fire strategy for failure and a great way to get stressed out for no reason.

Guess what I later discovered?

There is no need to be original. You can have the same conversation all day long with different people and nobody will suspect a thing!

People are happy to talk about mundane topics because there is no effort involved.

I have lived or worked in several countries including Ireland, England, Germany, Holland, Spain and the U.S.

And everywhere I have been people are happy to talk all day about:

  • the weather

  • their children

  • the new movie

  • the family pet

  • the boss

  • the traffic

You get the idea!

About The Author

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available for a limited time only at: http://www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com/report.htm







Google News - Top Stories

ABC News

Auto bailout request increases
CNNMoney.com - 50 minutes ago
GM is asking for up to $18 billion in federal loans while Ford asks for up to $9 billion, meaning that the Big Three now wants more than the $25 billion they originally sought.
Ford tries a new tune MarketWatch
UPDATE 1-Hoyer hopes for auto action next week by Congress Reuters
New York Times - The Associated Press - Washington Post - Forbes
all 2,204 news articles


Seattle Post Intelligencer

Obama, governors share plans for boosting public-works jobs
Christian Science Monitor - 34 minutes ago
The National Governors Association, meeting Tuesday, says $136 billion in road, bridge, and transit projects are ready to go, but just need funding.
Obama Promises Quick Relief for Governors New York Times
Governors appeal to Obama for aid Bizjournals.com
Salt Lake Tribune - Reuters - Bloomberg
all 1,591 news articles


CTV.ca

US official: India attack may have Pakistani roots
The Associated Press - 44 minutes ago
WASHINGTON (AP) - Evidence suggests that a group partly based in Pakistan carried out last week's attack in India, US officials said Tuesday, and they also revealed the US had warned the Indian government that terrorists appeared to be plotting an ...
India Demands Pakistan Hand Over Fugitives New York Times
Rice heads to India to ease tension with Pakistan Reuters India
Los Angeles Times - Bradenton Herald - Inland Empire News - Indian Express
all 2,187 news articles


The Miami Herald

Martinez Won’t Seek Re-Election
New York Times - 1 hour ago
By Damien Cave Senator Mel Martinez of Florida, one of the Republican Party’s most prominent Hispanic leaders, announced Tuesday he will not seek a second term in 2010.
Martinez will not seek re-election Bizjournals.com
Could 2010 be the Democrats' big year in the Senate? Los Angeles Times
Tallahassee.com - Washington Post - WCTV - RTT News
all 491 news articles


CollegeOTR

Local ornament makes White House Christmas special
Boston Globe - 40 minutes ago
Jessica Swegel decorated the ornament with a farm landscape that depicts a tree and picket fence dusted with fresh snow. By Mike Bello, Globe Staff A Mission Hill art teacher is helping to bring Massachusetts' special brand of Christmas cheer to the ...
White House nixes tree ornament for impeachment The Associated Press
Subversive Xmas Tree Ornament Won't Hang from White House Tree ABC News
Seattle Post Intelligencer - Seattle Times - KARE - CollegeOTR
all 175 news articles

Google
 

Copyright © 2006 Computer Hunter - A Division of Arthur´s Job Base