ComputerHunter.org |
|
|
|||
|
 |
The Solutions to Lifes 10 Biggest Problems!
Every day clients tell me about their problems, often in great detail, and I've noticed patterns that show up over and over. For many people, life's problems are viewed as "not enough money" or "not enough time". For couples, the problems are often around "communication" or "parenting" or sex. They think if they only had more money or more time or better sex or a better job, things would be wonderful. But it doesn't work that way, because these things are not the BIG PROBLEM. From my experience, I suggest life's really big problems are: 1. Tunnel Vision. The tendency to focus only on the immediate crisis or sore spot. Under stress, things look worse or more complex than they really are. The solution: Perspective. Ask if it will matter in 6 months. Ask what else is going on? How did I create this situation and, in an ideal world, what would I like to do about it? 2. Fear. The anxiety or terror that things will go badly, that we will fail or be embarrassed. The solution: Humor and Curiosity. Modern life has very few saber-tooth tigers. The situation is rarely life or death. Ask, What's the worst that can happen? What's the best? What can I learn? What would I do if I had no fear? 3. Confusion. The sense of being lost or unclear about our direction. The sense that we don't know our own priorities anymore. The solution: Responsible Choices. Choose your values and priorities and set your own path. Your life is yours. Check your moral compass, pick a direction and do something extraordinary! 4. Guilt. The belief that we have hurt or failed or sinned and deserve punishment. Guilt is either accurate, because sometimes we do behave badly, or it is false and simply an illusion. The solution: If we have transgressed, we must make restitution, ask forgiveness, learn from our error and move on. If it is false guilt, set it down as an unnecessary and irrational burden. 5. Shame. The belief that we are worth-less than others, that we have a terrible, incurable flaw. It is not that we have done something wrong (guilt), but that we are bad or wrong. The solution: Clear, rational thinking. Everyone has behaved badly, but no one was created badly! Any flaws only serve to make you stronger, more heroic or more compassionate toward others. 6. Loneliness. The belief that no one loves us, that no one cares and we must desperately cling to anyone who finds us attractive or acceptable. This creates dependency, not intimacy. The solution: Accurate Self-Assessment. Not everyone will love you, but many people will if they meet you, get to know you, and spend time working/playing along side you. 7. Resentment. Holding anger and refusing to move beyond real or imagined mistreatment in the past. Some people spend their whole lives as "victims", nurturing a terrible event in their past. The solution: Let go! Life is not fair and people do not always behave well or kindly. Use your trauma to make you wise, kind, gentle, and strong. Holding anger will not work. 8. Self-Doubt. The repeated, endless questioning of your own abilities, opinions or actions. The inability to take a stand, to act boldly, or to follow-through. The solution: Action! Think clearly, then take action and follow-through. Start small, but do it! You are the world's expert on your life! Use your wisdom to live well. 9. Stubbornness. The refusal or inability to re-assess a situation, change your mind, or admit you were wrong. The solution: Wisdom and Humility. Only a fool stays on a course that is headed for disaster! Search for new and better information, remain flexible, open and creative. When the situation changes, adjust accordingly and set a new course. 10. Addiction. Humans become addicted to drugs, but we also become addicted to our jobs, our opinions or our lifestyle. We can be addicted to people and need them rather than love them. The solution: Take a vacation! Periodically, walk in someone else's shoes. Break your habits, re-arrange your schedule, delegate those things that only you can do "right". Use habits and traditions to set you free, don't let habits enslave you! © Copyright 2003 by Philip E. Humbert. All Rights Reserved. This article may be copied and used in your own newsletter or on your website as long as you include the following information: "Written by Dr. Philip E. Humbert, writer, speaker and success coach. Dr. Humbert has over 300 free articles, tools and resources for your success, including a great newsletter! It's all on his website at: http://www.philiphumbert.com
Google News - Top Stories
|
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Visualization Visualisation plays a very important role with the mind and body relationship. Visualisation and Imagination are quite similiar. Visualisation is the picturing power of your mind. Your mind is like a camera constantly taking pictures of things around you. You are the star of your show. There is no one to give orders to your mind. The images you hold in your mind will determine the kind of life you will lead. When you first start to work with visualisation it is normally the imagination that comes to play. Visualisation takes time and practise to acquire. When working with visualisation it is important that one practises regularly. Try to practise at the same time each day, by doing that it becomes a habit. Mindfulness and Birthdays: Surprising Moments The first week of May is a big birthday time for my family. My husband's birthday is May 3rd, and my oldest daughter's is May 6th. What are You Waiting for? Do it now! Whatever it is you have been putting off, do it. This is your life, it is not a dress rehearsal. What is it you have always wanted to do but, for some unknown reason, never quite get to? I am referring to those usually minor desires, not major goals like "get married" or "start a business." Courage and Fear Mark Twain once said, "Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear not absence of fear." Can One Person Increase Motivation in Another Person? The answer is yes, of course, right? People motivate other people. After all, what about coaches and inspirational speakers? They are paid to motivate other people to do great things. The Magic of Success is Actually a Law Set in Motion. Finding it is Quite Simple Building Energy Around your Investment! Develop Guts to Achieve Glory It is just amazing the amount of people who don't have the courage to go after their dreams.They sit around living a life they are not happy with and still they do nothing about it. Motivation: Small Changes, Big Results When I was 8 years old, my parents let me go to the toy store with my buddy Mike and his Mom. How to Become an Effective Self-Help User "Know Yourself" That's what the big guy said way back when? Was it Aristotle, Plato or Socrates? Anyhow, that's the essence of what this article is about. What Is Failing Forward? What an absurd statement! Absurd or not, progress is not possible without failure. It is part of being an evolving and growing human being. Are You Still Stuck on Still? Are you still "stuck on still?" If so, don't let fear, doubt or disappointment rob you of your future, or keep you from your desires. Instead, see yourself as the person that you want to become. Human Beings naturally navigate towards the pictures they keep in their minds. Empower yourself and create the images you want to attract. Maintaining Your Motivation I recently spoke to a group of sales professionals at the end of their training conference. The attendees had participated in many learning sessions over a two day period ? most of which were product related. I was scheduled to speak after dinner and I was somewhat concerned how attentive they would be by this time. Gremlins! Time to Take Control It is a wonder we can function at all. Each of us has multiple personality types all crying for attention. Most of us think one way, work another, and feel in a personality style different from either working or thinking styles! And you question why you are sometimes confused? Who are they to say it cant be done? Doesn't it just burn you up when you have just shared your 'great idea' with someone and not only are they not as enthusiastic as you, they even go as far as to say your idea won't work! Trust me if this has happened to you you're not alone. Ten Sure-Fire Rules To Put Old On Hold By At Least 25 Years Would you like to feel and function like age 40 for an extra 25 years? Would you like to have a ton of energy, able to work at something you enjoy? Would you like to be free of many of the physical and mental problems generally considered age related? The First Step Today is an anniversary of sorts for me. Three years ago today, I publicly launched Tomorrow's Edge after years of getting ready, talking about how I was someday going to do it, and researching everything but advertising! It was a huge first step in the middle of a bunch of first steps that I had taken up to that point. Naturally, it fell flat on it's face because of my lack of education in the marketing area. So, here I am three years later, better educated, dusted off, boot straps pulled up, repeating that first step. I take a deep breath, psyche myself up, wiggle my toes a bit, bend my knee, lift my foot, and sit back down with another cup of coffee?. Maybe in a minute or so. Quick Tips On Getting Motivated When You Dont Feel Like It The secret to getting started on something when you don't feel like it, is surprising, but easy. Death by Overwork: Motivationally Speaking Its a Zero The Japanese have a word for death by overwork: Karoshi. A recent survey said 40 percent of all Japanese workers fear that they will actually work themselves to death. Making the Most of Now "You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this." --Henry David Thoreau (1817-62) American writer, author, naturalist I Give Up! How to NOT Say Those Words! Boy, I tell you....it seems the world is just going crazy these days! The economy is going haywire, the war is started, and things just seem to be out of control!
|
|
|
|
|
